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Internationale Gedichte Sämtliche nicht-deutschsprachige Gedichte. |
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06.09.2006, 16:38 | #1 |
The burden of being lovely
I wish I was more self ashured
be more like you to sometimes leave you ungreatfully to sometimes make you blue. Being unconcerned you love me to unchecked be a part of you being kept in your heart in love with the strange things I sometimes do. But I can't cause I'm afraid To loose you to harm you to wake another person deep inside of you To loose you but to love you when all I want to do is amaze you And now I stand alone with the burden of being lovely in the night, when it's dark the moon shines in its beauty I'm like your shadow and I'll never walk on by but when there's night and I've dissappeared would you search for my light would you even try? |
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03.10.2006, 17:45 | #2 |
RE: The burden of being lovely
Also... ein wunderschönes gedicht, aber mir sind einige Fehler aufgefallen... und zwar: loose = locker... du meinst "lose"; "dissappeared" hat nur ein "s"; und assured, nicht ashured... sorry, aber ich musste des ausbessern... *smile* Is nicht böse gemeint =)
bye bye, Lilly |
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03.10.2006, 18:09 | #3 |
abgemeldet
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in my opinion there are to many " you " in your lovely poem [ 16 ]
dear Lilly, solltest du irgendwelche Rechtschreibungsfehler bei mir finden? dann darfst du diese alle behalten.[ smile ] |